When a woman on the staff of the school where I worked became engaged, a friend and colleague offered her some advice. ‘The first ten years are the hardest.’ ‘How long have you been married?’ she asked. ‘Ten years’, he replied.
Bill piled up a stool at his favorite bar and announced, “My wife Suzie must love me more than any woman has ever loved any man!” “What makes you say that?” the bartender inquired. “Last week,” Bill explained, “I had to take a couple of sick days from work. Suzie was so thrilled to have [...]
When her husband passed away, the wife put the usual death notice in the newspaper, but added that he had died of gonorrhoea. Once the daily newspapers had been delivered, a good friend of the family phoned and complained bitterly, “You know very well that he died of diarrhoea, not gonorrhoea.” Replied the widow, “Yes, [...]
A married couple have been stranded on a deserted island for many years. One day another man washes up on shore. He and the wife become attracted to each other right away, but realize they must be creative if they are to engage in any hanky-panky. The husband, however, is very glad to see the [...]
It is two o’clock in the morning and a husband and his wife are asleep when suddenly the phone rings. The husband picks up the phone and before he can say anything, some talking came from the other end of the line and the husband says “How the heck do I know – what am [...]
A couple decided to Alaska for a romantic weekend. When they got to the cabin it was cold so the wife asked her husband to go chop some wood for that fire place. He came in after 5 minutes and told his wife that his hands were cold, so she said her put your hands [...]
The newlyweds are in their honeymoon room and the groom decides to let the bride know where she stands right from the start of the marriage. He proceeds to take off his trousers and throw them at her. He says, “Put those on.” The bride replies, “I can’t wear your trousers.” He replies, “And don’t [...]
A man was surprised to hear from an old school friend of his asking if he would be the best man at his soon to be held wedding. They had not seen each other for a while and he did not really know that much about the bridegroom to be, all he remembered about him [...]
Hubby – You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office. Why? Wife – When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your picture and the problem disappears. Hubby – You see, how miraculous and powerful I am for you? Wife – Yes, I see your picture and say [...]
HE : I’m a photographer. I’ve been looking for a face like yours! SHE : I’m a plastic surgeon. I’ve been looking for a face like yours!!! HE : Hi! didn’t we go on a date once? or was it twice? SHE : Must’ve been once. I never make the same mistake twice!!! HE : [...]
